You will not fail if you make a mistake, you will fail when you blame others for your mistakes
We are all human and as humans we don’t like to be wrong. We don’t like to make mistakes and especially we don’t like things to be our fault.
I’ve seen many times where people have blamed others for their lack of success or their mistakes. I’ve been blamed before for mistakes of others. I’ve blamed others for my mistakes. When you begin to blame others for things, you don’t take responsibility for you actions or your situation and you don’t learn or grow.
The hard truth is, wherever you are now, it is your fault.
Realize your in control
You have control over you life and of situations that happen to you. The sooner you begin to take responsibility for your actions and your situation, the sooner you can work to resolve it.
If you never recognize it is your problem, then you will have to rely on someone else to solve it for you. Once you realize that the problem is yours, you can then take the steps needed to solve it.
Losing your power
When you blame others, not only are you unable to see that you have a problem to solve, but you lose your power.
If you take responsibility for yourself and your actions you will be able to learn from your mistakes, find a better way to do it, and try next time to do better. Winners have tried and failed many times. But they pick themselves up, accept responsibility for their failures, and try again.
If you never take the first step in accepting responsibility for your situation then you will never work to fix it. You will have to rely on other to fix it or make it right. You are at the mercy of others for your happiness and joy. No one should have control over how you feel and function.
Take control of your own life
Taking control of your life and situation may be hard or scary, but it must be done. You must realize that you create situations, they don’t just happen to you.
Next time you are faced with a situation you want to blame others for, think about these questions.
- Is it really the other persons fault or am I at fault?
- Am I blaming my performance on an uncontrollable?
- Is this problem something that is a controllable?
- Did you do everything in your power to avoid this mistake?
- If you took responsibility for this mistake, what would you learn from it?
- What would you do differently next time?
Asking yourself these questions can help you take control of you situation and shift the blame from others to yourself.
Some common examples of blaming others
Salespeople most commonly blame others if they don’t make their sales goals. I know I’ve made some excuses and blamed others for the situations.
They got more customers than me.
What can I do to get more customers?
Everyone came in for issues.
Am I optimizing every opportunity?
They didn’t want the service.
Did I discover why that don’t want it?
They gave me an objection.
Did I take the time to attempt to overcome the objection?
Many of these are similar to the excuses that we blame others for daily, monthly, quarterly in our everyday lives. Some of these typical excuses give your control to something or someone else, here are some questions you can ask yourself to shift the control.
There was traffic.
Did I leave early enough?
You forgot to do…
Did I also forget to do this thing?
I’m too tired.
Am I tired or is it a will issue?
This is not what I asked for.
Did I go over the details or read the fine print?
The sooner you can begin to start taking responsibility for yourself and your actions and stop blaming others, you will find that you will have much more power and avoid bad situations easier.
So admit that it’s your fault. Say “my bad” and work to do better next time.